Sunday, February 28, 2010
We're all damned
Saturday, February 27, 2010
It's only forever, not long at all.....
Anywayyyyy. The book is Rubykon. The title is the name of a magical world, which a girl tumbles into and has ADVENTURES, with an ending which I really wasn't expecting. The two sisters are named after Marky Mark's own children (as well as Juliana's guide to Rubykon, Woobie, who is named after a teddy bear that is Juliana's I believe) and the book is also dedicated to them, which proves he does have a heart after all. Anyway, being a fantasy book we can say that yes, there's a quest, there's a villain, and the world is at stake, or at least Saroolean. And, before I go on, what do you think that 'A' stands for? Antony? I hope it's Antony. You know, Mark Antony? Yeah? Yeah. (God, I am so funny. Sooooo funny.)
Anyway, when Juliana is new in Rubykon, Woobie (who lived there originally, but got lost in a portal to our world and ended up as Juliana's) tells Juliana she should see the emperor. Juliana asks of Woobie: "'Is he human like I am? Is he an animal, like a lion?'" (29). Ohhh, reference! I can dig it, Aslan.
Oh, and at another point Juliana is mocked for believing in dragons; she is told they're but fairy stories and she needs to "'focus on reality'" (74). I LOVE when fantasy novels do that, or whatever. You know, the main character's in some strange new world and they're like, "Oh when are we going to see (x)!" and they just get shot down. I feel like that happens in The Silver Chair, like either Eustace or Puddleglum shoot down something Jill says. Maybe. The point is, I chuckled most heartily.
"'Nothing is certain but the attempt'" (80). I am most enjoying of that saying, Marky Mark. Kudos. And then Sneblin (a character whom comes into Juliana's and Woobie's party shortly after their travels begin) is all, [my kind] may fail, but we always make the attempt. Whoop, there it is! The idea of Northern courage, perpetuated by JRR Tolkien and just recently taught to me by Marky Mark himself. The idea of it is to press on even when there's hardly any hope--to quit is the coward's action. Northern, because this was a belief firmly upheld by the Norse tribes--you see, if you died in battle fighting bravely, you'd be whisked off to Valhalla to wine and dine with the gods until Ragnarok. Ragnarok was the final battle, gods vs. the giants, where if you were human you were pretty much dead for a second time automatically. So, their whole lives were basically hopeless, as they'd be killed twice. Sooo. Yep.
"'Ignorance breeds confidence'" (83). Oh, that it does, that it does.
The city Juliana must go to is Saroolean as I'm sure you've gathered--its other name is 'the Blue City'. OHHHH. I laughed so hard when I realized that. Wasn't Cerulean Misty's town? Maybe? It would make sense, seeing as that was the water gym and all... Actually, while I'm thinking of it, was Lt. Surge really a Lieutenant at some point? I don't think he looked old enough to have been a lieutenant (though it has been a while). And why would they even have armies in Pokemon lands? It'd be all, oh, "I have an army of 5,000 men!" and I'd be all "Well, my Tyranitar knows earthquake, so...."
"Was that what life was like then? One traveled with others, learning a little about them, then moving on to new friends while the others became relegated to memories and pictures. Was this what great thinkers meant when they said we are truly [alone] in the world?" (126). Aw. That's minorly depressing. But it seems to ring at least partially true. Who knows? Not I, not yet.
Anyway. I loved the whole book, save for the very, very end. If you'd like me to spoil a book before you can even get your mitts on it, read on: Well, Juliana eventually has the chance to return home. But, she does not. Which is altogether not surprising--I mean, if you shipped me off to Narnia and expected me to return home--nah, it isn't happening. I wouldn't want to go back to my humdrum life. But I mean--her parents! Her friends! It says eventually their memories will fade (as they've forgotten they have another daughter, and Juliana even forgot about her sister) but stilllll. It just bothered me. I don't know...
But, I did enjoy the book, and I certainly would give it to a child, even my own, if they were into that sort of thing. They'd probably get it anyway. With me for a mother it would be genetically impossible for them not to be a fantasy dork. Sorry future child, it's encoded in my genes. Man. So. Look for this book sometime in the up to five year future, I'd nary. Then when you go back and comment on this, you'll be all, "Angela, you're right, that was awesome!" and I'll be all, "Yeah, but you're not a true fan, because I liked Marky Mark before you." Burn.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Don't come closer or I'll have to go
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
I guess the good times ain't wrong, just killing me
So, I like Bukowski. Even though he's super gross sometimes, mainly when he talks about Chinaski wiping himself and doing a bad job of it. Or just in general. No thanks. Facototum is basically Henry Chinaski wandering around, drunken, gaining and losing jobs, gaining and losing women. Yep.
"'How much money we got?' They looked through their pockets. They had a nickel. 'Well, what are we going to do?' 'I don't know. Let's start walking.' I watched them walk off, out of the park, into the city" (23).
So, like I said, early on Chinaski takes a short stint back at his parents' home. Instead of going out and looking for a job (as he is an ex-college student) he listens to "symphony music" (25) and smokes his father's cigarettes and is voyeur to the sexy housewife across the way. Hmm, sounds like someone named Alex de Large. Just saying...
"'Well, you see, I've been painting. A painter, you know? I've run out of money. Can't sell the stuff.' ... 'Cheer up. Maybe you'll be famous after you're dead'" (42). Wow. How... reassuring. I'm relieved now. Looks like I can always dream...
"'Why do you want to work in a ladies' dress shop?' 'I've always liked ladies in ladies' dresses'" (56). Hehe. Can you imagine if someone tried that today? You'd probably get cops called on you.
"'Have you ever been in love?' 'Love is for real people.' 'You sound real.' 'I dislike real people.' 'You dislike them?' 'I hate them'" (60). Of, Chinaski is being cynical, as he is 97.999% of the time. But this conversation for some reason stands out to me, I can very easily picture it. Chinaski, scowling, giving Gertrude (who asks him if he's ever been in love) a dull, uninterested (but somewhat nasty) look from over his solder, hand on a half empty shot glass with a cigarette tucked in between his fingers, spilling ashes on the bar top.
"'Don't worry, baby,' I'd say, 'the next hard bump we hit will turn the lights on.' ... Jan would bounce up and down, trying to hold on to her bottle of port. I'd grip the wheel and look for a bit of light on the road ahead. Hitting those bumps would always turn the lights on. Sometimes sooner, sometimes later, but we'd always get the lights on" (96). So yeah. This is what I'm going to pretend is symbolism. The bump being something, well, bad happening. Chinaski losing yet another job, say, but after--something always arises. Though he goes through jobs like a wildfire, there's always something else. So, the light, would be--uh, jobs? Crud. I sound stupid. But the point is, I feel when Jan finally leaves--and I believe the car goes with her--he's done. It's over for him. *
"I kept telling myself all women in the world weren't whores, just mine" (140). Okay, so there's more humor than literary points or what have you. But Bukowski is a pretty humorous guy, if not laugh-out-loud hilarious at the very least tongue-in-cheek. Or chuckle-worthy. Chuckle chuckle.
"Then I gave him a look straight out of 'Casablanca'" (158). Oh hey, reference to an awesome movie. On an unrelated note, my dad was reenacting scenes from Casablanca today, replacing Sam with Rod Serling. As in, Humphrey: "Play it again, Sam (etc)." Rod: "Do you know who the hell I am?" It was pretty hilarious.
*Here comes the end, so spoiler alert!: Chinaski goes to a strip club and watches a really sexy dancer. He has less than a dollar in his pocket, no prospects, drunk, nothing. It ends with "I couldn't get it up" (205), you know, for this sexy dancer he's watching. This is me, again, pretending I can find symbolism: his not being able to, uh, 'get it up', would be his inability to fix his life, you know, get his life out of the gutter. Does that sound ridiculous? Maybe. But, that's how it seems to me, and at this point, he's nothing. He's a ragged hobo, practically. He's not even interested in the girls. He's done. I always feel like he just went into some alleyway and died, and that was the unwritten ending. I mean, it just felt like such an... such an end. You don't even need to describe more, because you know he's going to end up dead in an alleyway within weeks, or more likely, a few days. So... yeah. The fact that he didn't die and turned up in Post Office always weirdly disappoints me. Like, for the most part, I've made my peace with that fact, but it still kind of feels like a cop-out. Like sometimes when you want the main character to live, but you know it would be total BS if he actually did and you'd end up hating the whole book/movie/TV show/radio program. Yup.
There's evidently a movie based off this book. Intrigued. Hitting that up, most likely tomorrow, if Netflix stops hating me. Which is unlikely. It knows I am not Jenna. "I'm sorry, I can't let you do that, Angela." Gbrgrsgrfffghhhh. Crud.
And now comes Post Office! This is funnier than its predecessor, and also ten times stranger. The people Chinaski delivers mail to--they're crazy. The people he works with are mad. Anyway. As you can guess, Chinaski is, in this book, working in a post office. He's, as I said, almost 50 if not 50 by the book's end. This may or may not be his last hurrah, as it has no 'obvious' ending. Actually, I feel like the end if sort of a cop-out as well. But also, I have no clue if this is the end of Chinaski's 'series'. As it was written in '71, I kind of doubt it. But. All that is for another time!
Ah, early on Chinaski happens to wander into a church that has showers and such. (Do all Roman-Catholic churches have showers? Is that why I'd be surprised by that?) Chinaski, always an alchie, drinks the wine, you know, the wine for communion. Then he debates on taking a shower, but eventually decides not to as he imagines what the headlines would look like if someone were to find him: "MAILMAN CAUGHT DRINKING THE BLOOD OF GOD AND TAKING A SHOWER, NAKED, IN ROMAN CATHOLIC CHURCH" (22). HAHAHA. Can you imagine? Though I'm not sure why the 'naked' moniker is necessary--don't most people shower naked? No? Am I doing it wrong!? Crud.
One incredibly sad bit involves an elderly mailman named GG. He had worked so long on one particular route that the kids loved him, he brought candy for them, the parents knew he was a nice old man. A new woman moves to the neighborhood, is unaware of this behavior, and accuses GG of child molestation. Poor guy, that would happen. All of the scenes with him are pretty depressing, as he's so old that he's literally just slowing down. What's even worse, is no one seems to care but, of all people, Chinaski.
"'All right now, you've got a good job. Keep your nose clean and you've got the security the rest of your life.' Security? You could get security in jail. Three squares and no rent to pay, no utilities, no income tax, no child support. No license plate fees. No traffic tickets. No drunk driving raps. No losses at the race track. Free medical attention... Free burial" (66). Well... he has a point...
Ah, yes. You remember when Palin made her comment about Russia? Apparently she's a Bukowski fan: A postal office head is trying to get the mailmen revved up to work. As he claims, "'EACH EXTRA YOU STICK BEYOND DUTY HELPS DEFEAT THE RUSSIANS!'" (76). (Keep in mind, this was written and set during the Cold War.) But, before he tells them that, he shows the men a map of the world--paying special attention to Russia and Alaska's proximity. As he says, "'That's Alaska!" And there they are! Looks almost as if they could jump across, doesn't it?'" (76). Hehe.
My absolute favorite scene is when Chinaski decides to celebrate his job by making escargot for his then-wife, Joyce. She gets sick eating them because she is disgusted by them--moreover, by their "'tiny little a--holes" (87). It's just so funny. And, of course, Chinaski's comeback to that is hilarious as well--the best part is most likely when he shouts "'ASSHOLES COVER THE EARTH!'" (87), though his whole spiel is hilarious. I can't even do the scene justice. If nothing else, at least read this scene whilst in your local bookstore. I literally laugh so hard I cry.
The scene that makes me most angry is close by as well. Joyce mistakenly buys a mentally retarded dog. Now, the dog is a handful, but any dog would be. It still loves her, as she should it. What makes me so mad is that she's in her stilettos, and the puppy wanders up to her a licks her ankle. She kicks it in the stomach with the pointy end of her shoes (the front). I can honestly say few things I have read disgusted or angered me more than that passage. Every time I read it I just want to jump in the book and slap her. What a disgusting worm of a human.
"'What's the sin in being poor?'" (111).
Chinaski, making the move on yet another woman, asks about her husband. She's divorced, and she says he was 'no good', as all he ever did was drink and bet on horses. It's very clear she doesn't know Chinaski that well....
"Women were meant to suffer; no wonder they asked for constant declarations of love" (155).
Anyway, as for the end--have you ever read The BFG by Roald Dahl? And at the end, you remember, it's revealed that the BFG himself 'wrote' the book. That's basically what is implied at the end of this book. I mean, that Chinaski 'wrote' the book, not the BFG. What a cheap ending. But maybe I'm just angry that things were turning out okay for Chinaski. I am pretty terrible. **
I watched the entire Twilight Zone series over the past three weeks. It is amazing. If you have never seen The Twilight Zone, go. Now. Now. I mean, it's not like I ever had any doubts about its awesomeness. I've just experienced it all now. Of course, there are lemon episodes--the last episode made me not mourn The Twilight Zone's end--that one where they sell the car that tells the truth to Stalin (or another powerful man of the USSR at the time) because he just happens to be in the sticks of the US--'Black Leather Jackets' was a pretty dumb episode--the one that I swear 'Jumanji' ripped off of--et cetera. But truly, the good outweighs the bad and Rod Serling you're a genius, bro.
**I told Robby D I preferred The Road to All the Pretty Horses and he asked me if I like infants roasted on spits. Uh, yeah, who doesn't? You know how I roll, G. Uhm, I mean, D.
Monday, February 15, 2010
If you liked it then you should have put a bit on it
Man, that made me sound totally cynical, huh? I just wasn't buying it. One, there's not a huge amount about horses, but about halfway through there's pages and pages and pages about horses and breaking them and that was enough to make me hate the last half of the book. Look. Horses are boring. King of the Wind is boring. Black Beauty is boring. That Dreamworks movie about that horse that's the same color as my dog... boring. Even in small amounts, they are boring. Obviously my full disdain for horses--at the very least media about horses--was misunderstood or underestimated by Robby D. THEY ARE BORING. I mean, they're nice to pet or whatever, but boring. It's not like they pull sleighs full of medicine across Alaska to sick kids dying of typhoid fever. Anyway. Before I hated the book, I had trouble being drawn in. The whole genre, gunfighters in the West or what have you just don't really interest me. Maybe the occasional Tom Mix movie, but even then. It just kind of leaves me cold. I'm indifferent.
"'Strangest thing I ever ate,' said Blevins. 'I guess I'd have to say that would be an oyster'" (63). This made me laugh. An oyster! An oyster?? And then I remembered they were in the middle of Texas. Strangest thing I've ever eaten? Escargot. Way better than an oyster, though. Mmmm.
"'Somebody can wake up and sneeze somewhere in Arkansas or some damn place and before you're done there's wars and ruination and all hell" (92). Oh, you mean like how a single butterfly flapping its wings here can cause a tornado or whatever in Brazil? I like the single butterfly flapping thing much better. At least there's some correlation, you know, the wind no matter how slight it be to a great wind. I can't correlate a sneeze with war and ruination. To me, it looks like what's being said is just STUFF HAPPENS RANDOMLY. The idea of cause and effect is lost in McCarthy's take on the saying.
"'You can't do nothin with a dead person. Only Jesus could do that" (297). The best quote from the entire book.
Yup. So, I'll be thinking twice before I read another McCarthy book. I probably have not done the book justice--but like I said, it's just not my thing. I'm not so into this genre.
What am I into? Recently, it's been White Collar. It's a show on HBO, so I can't watch it normally at home, but when I babysit and the kids are asleep I can watch it. To be honest, I first started watching because of Matthew Bomer , but I have quickly gotten into the plot and flow of the story. He's an ex-white collar criminal, and he's been hired by the feds to catch others of his breed. He's got a sweet tongue, a trustable face, great acting, and my heart--err, lots of talent. It's an interesting show. It's more my speed than wandering about Mexico as a somewhat modern-day cowboy. Soooo yepppp.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Then suddenly you know, you're never going home
Monday, February 8, 2010
Don't you forget about me
Ehmmm what else. I'm rereading On the Road for Robby D and I'm reading the first Lord of the Rings book for my other class with Marky Mark (which is right after my creative writing class with him, which means it's like one big huge class block of awesome). So yup. Oh, and to prove my ultimate dorkiness? Marky Mark was asking me questions about the Narnia series in class. You know. Not to brag or anything, but I know my way around the inside of a wardrobe...
Oh hey, guess what else! You get political commentary from yours truly! And my commentary is this... I'm okay with Palin becoming president, even though I think she's an airheaded fool and two-faced and I disagree with her on most of her views--yes, I'd be okay with her becoming president... if she can defeat Mel Gibson in the Thunderdome.